white trash ways

{this is our house}

i am posting a picture to show exactly where we live. because after reading this post, if you had not seen where we lived, the picture you would paint in your mind might be ghastly. 

we don't live here, but sometimes it feels like it! 
 all of the pictures in this post were taken over two consecutive days... they are not a collection over time. all the pictures are of my front yard... 
 for reals, my front yard.  

keep in mind, i work from home. my studio is a quaint 500 square feet attached to my home. perfect for me in almost every way. it has a separate entrance, so unless i am meeting a bride, customers rarely come inside my house. it is far from a store front, but a few days a week it kind of is. my family guys continuously forget this. 
for years i have daydreamed of transplanting my studio to the front of our property. i have the spot picked out. from this dream spot you cannot see my house. 

so why do i daydream of relocating 500 feet away? 

so customers do not get sanford and son vibes when pulling into my driveway. most of the time there's man things everywhere! everywhere except where it belongs. my son's boat, too many cars in our driveway, a trailer full of trash cans... and much more.  and two people are to blame for this. jeff and bennett. 

when building our house, it was unbelievably stress free. we had an insanely honest builder, loved our house plans as they were, and we agreed on almost everything... except where to put Jeff's shop. we really argued over this. in our last house it was visible from the driveway. don't even get me started! it was so bad i made him put up a privacy fence. which was almost worse. so in our new house since we had plenty of room, the workshop was not going directly behind our house. no way jose'!

we compromised. my husband's shop is close enough to hear when dinner is ready. but far enough back to be considered hidden. far enough, shrubs tall enough to make me not care what is on the inside or out. sanford and your son can rock it out back there...

but please, not in the front yard!
when i kind of, sort of, have a store front.

so here's a real conversation i never dreamed of having with a potential bride and her family. 
"hi so nice to meet you... please excuse the boat motor on my front porch. and shot gun shells.'

the first half of our consultation, my mind kept creeping back to the white trash jungle these nice people just had to trek through... just to get to my front door.

bennett's boat motor
 i snapped a few pictures minutes after they left. 
here's what was in my front yard that day.
 a box of shotgun shells at the base of the boat motor. 

 no kidding, no joke... this stack of mud tires was in my circular driveway... right beside where my bride parked. most likely they had to walk around them. 
seems the day before, my son's friend was giving away an almost complete set of bald mud tires. and what southern boy would ever say no to bald mud tires? especially when there's three of them. (?)  this mortified me the most!

i swear, given the opportunity (like me being out of town), i am confident that their project wagoner would be on blocks, the engine hanging from a tree, in our front yard.
back to the front porch. 
the weirdest item on my front porch.
bennett's hunting /fishing pants laying in the sun to dry. 

so the next three pictures are not in my front yard. 
they are on the side yard, but can clearly be seen from the front yard! or my studio door!

a battery to something.
and pitiful bushes...
our old boat beside our future outdoor fireplace ;)

my guys are clearly out of white trash control.
one more truck load of man stuff and the show hoarders will come knocking.

{insert an evening mommy temper tantrum}

they loaded up their cart and cleaned up their mess.

24 hours later, my front yard was white trash free!
my sweet husband in his neat suit and tie... don't let him fool you. it's all a cover up for his hoarding ways. 
my son... sadly doesn't even try hide his.
for the bride who trekked her way through our white trash wonderland. 
she booked my largest package. 
and her daddy is running for a state elected position.
Auralee said...

But that bride knows where theres talent and you have it! Miss seeing you!

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